Oh hi, Lily Allen. Welcome to 2008.
Lily. Girlfriend. You know I love you. I really didn’t want to have to do this. We kick it in my car, in the shower and on my iPod at the beach.
Which is why I’m confused that you’re choosing to smoke from the same bong as Blossom Russo and Mischa Barton. You know better than that.
Oh and also, your blond hair still looks bad.
Anyway, I gave you a bag of bacon because at least this time you’re not topless. And also because you have a fresh pair of Nykes on.
Love,
Kitty
May 29th, 2008 - 2:04 pm
She does have a fresh pair of Nykes on. She’ll probably eat that bacon on the couch, on the floor, on the wall. Or maybe in the bathroom because you know she’s trained to pimp.
Anyway, the bacon looks delicious. Her outfit looks horrendous. As does the blond hair. Poor Lily. Let’s take her out for a drink and tell her how it is.
May 29th, 2008 - 5:00 pm
Oh girl, she’d drink us under the table. I’m embarassed to say that, but it’s true. She’s a certified pro. Drop it low. Stop and go.