Amber: Hey Clay! I heard you knocked a woman up. ATTA BOY!

Clay: You got it, Sister! (Damn, I look so sexy when I wink.)
Amber: Um, you kinda look like you’re having a stroke. But anyway, how was the sex?

Clay: Waaaiiit. What sex?
Amber: You did have sex with a woman, right? You got her pregnant?

Clay: Um.
Amber: […]

Okay, I must preface this post by announcing that Tony Romo is grade A premium man-meat. And Jessica knows it. Lucky bitch. (that’s not him in the photo, BTW.)
Jessica loves Tony’s fidelity to Team Cowboy. They even like to mess around with “blue stuff”. I’ll let your mind take that where it will because I’m […]

Any girl with eyes in her head can see that Brody Jenner is clearly manna from heaven, courtesy of the Meat Gods. Apparently he’s only 23, which would normally kind of freak my shit, but he could be a fetus and I wouldn’t care. Too far? Okay, sorry.
Anyway, in my book he is Primo, Grade-A […]

Our favourite meat eater, Ms. McShoveItInMe herself has graced the pages of MeatBeat once again.
While on tour with Bad Charlotte in Prague, she slipped on a piece of meat and found herself in all-too-familiar territory: The land of manmeat.
Now correct me if I’m wrong, but doesn’t Benji look a little bit like the lovechild of […]

Hey y’all.
Here at MeatBeat we’re firm believers in increasing our protein intake. And we’ll pretty much in-take it in any form, if you know what I’m saying. That being said, Amber and I are feeling all western and tingly inside lookin at this shot of RyRy.
So tingly, in fact, we threw on our best 4H […]

What up, bitches.
Remember 2Pac? How could you forget. I love all the lyrics to that song, particularly the ones about putting the satin in my panties. I’ve been rapping it in my head all morning and just had to put it on paper. It only is a little bit related to this post. But I […]